Life was never easy for Beth. Yet as the struggles of life mounted she always seemed to rise to the occasion. She was timid and shy, yet confident in her own way. Between the paralyzing bouts of anxiety and memories of the brutality of her youth, she had truly risen from the ashes. Her husband had never fully understood the connection between her promiscuous sexual appetites and the abuse of her childhood. But it was clear to me, and there in lied the problem.
Beth and I had been casual friends for years now. An old high school friend of my wife, Beth had found her way into my sphere of friends. She had dated my best friend briefly and he used to tell me stories of how kinky she could be in the bedroom. I used to lay awake at night and think how lucky my friend was to be able to hold her that way. She was slender, slightly taller than average, with a mousy voice and pleasant smile. Her eyes were a beautiful hazel, and her skin was pale and smooth. Her body was a bit of a marvel. Her slender frame supported a magnificent pair of breasts. Full and heavy, an F cup or larger, they were the only thing most men saw when they looked upon her. Her hips had a slight flare and the curves of her body concealed a magnificent ass. It was neither too big nor too small. It had an inviting curve, yet was not overstated, Many times I found myself staring when she would turn to walk away.
Life began to get complicated when my wife and I divorced. I suddenly found myself displaced, and recovering from a significant financial blow. As people in these situations sometimes do, I found my rock bottom. A moment that will not soon be forgotten. I found myself living in a van parked on a friend’s land. It was December, a few days before Christmas. I was following my nightly routine of drinking half a fifth of Jameson and trying to keep warm in front of a small space heater. The depression was starting to get to me, and I was teetering on the edge of making a foolish decision. As I drank, I rolled over all of the foolish decisions that had brought me to this point. The wife I had loved had left me for my best friend. She had her reasons, all of them legitimate, and I had no one to blame but myself. As the bottle continued to disappear, I reached under the air mattress I was lying on. There was a hard plastic case, and with a trembling hand I retrieved it. Inside was a beautiful handgun, my beloved .45 automatic. I was drunk and so depressed that I could barely find the energy to open the case. I was at my end, and I had no desire to see another sunrise. I still remember the sound it made as I chambered a round, I still remember the aroma of gun oil and the flavor of the finely polished steel on my tongue. It was the end, I prayed a silent prayer for God to forgive me if it was right for him to do so, and I squeezed the trigger. Nothing happened. I sat there stunned for a moment, fully expecting to be in the next world by then. As my wits returned I realized that I hadn’t deactivated the safety. It seemed ironic that the safety had saved me from myself, for a moment anyway. I thumbed it off and sat for a second considering what it was I had started. That was when my phone buzzed. The sound seemed so foreign in that moment, I guess I hadn’t expected to hear such a sound again. I checked the screen and saw that it was a number I hadn’t stored in my contacts. I checked the text wondering who had interrupted my last night on earth. To my surprise it was Beth.
“Hi, It’s Beth. Can you talk? I need a friend right now.”
After a moment, I realized she was actually talking to me. Someone needed MY help? A switch flipped in my brain, and so to did a safety reengage.
“Yeah B, I can talk.”
I typed slowly. Had I really just drank a fifth of Jameson and tried to kill myself? It was only seconds ago, yet it seemed a lifetime had passed. Ten or so seconds later my phone began to vibrate again. I answered it and heard the quivering voice of a crying female on the other end. She too had been drinking and had inadvertently told her husband that she had cheated on him. Josh was a hot tempered son of a bitch, and hearing news like this less than two years into their marriage was more than he could handle. He had stormed out and promised he would never see her again.
Beth loved Josh, and this wasn’t the first time she had cheated on him, but she was being starved for attention. She had also learned at a young age that men were easy to attract, and her beauty meant she could trade sex for her own comfort, a warm body to keep the nightmares away when her own husband went away on business. She never felt good about it, but her need to be held outweighed her guilt. It appeared however, that such a decision would be the death of her marriage.
We talked for hours that night. I learned of her childhood, and of the abuse that she had received. There was a part of me that wished to put the .45 in my lap to more constructive use, but that wasn’t what this poor woman needed right now. What I didn’t realize was that she was giving me something I needed as well, a reason pendik escort to live.
Months passed and Beth and I both got back on our feet. I found a shitty little apartment and she, being of better means found a nice townhouse in a nice area. We texted regularly and tried to hang out once a week at least, but life tended to get in the way. One evening I was just getting into bed when my phone buzzed. It was Beth asking if I could come over. Apparently she had suffered a miserable day at work and needed to blow off steam. My heart raced a bit. I knew by no this was how she operated, she would lure a man to her house to blow off steam, get drunk and throw herself at him, and feel miserable about it for weeks. It had been nearly a year since I had been with anyone. The thought of her body against mine really got my blood boiling in a way I had forgotten. Could I trust her intentions here? Could I trust my own? I knew what this was, I knew what was coming, and I knew that what she really needed was a good friend who wouldn’t take advantage of her, but could I be that noble?
I arrived at her place an hour later, a six pack of good dark beer in hand. When I knocked on the door, I could hear her cursing at her dogs and stumbling into things. Finally when the door opened, I saw her there, her perfect figure, her flowing blonde hair, her adorable librarian glasses, and those firm heaving breasts. I also saw a sling on her left arm.
I came in and we sat down on the couch, she explained that she had dislocated her shoulder at work when she had stumbled into some shelving. She seemed embarrassed, but she was known for being clumsy, we always joked that her center of gravity was all wrong. When I pointed that out she laughed and hefted one of her exquisite bosoms in her good hand, then agreed they had their own gravitational pull; like every guy’s eyes in a room. I could feel energy transfer to the secondary command cortex in my loins. She was finally starting to smile between winces. A sign that the prescription pain killers and the alcohol were working their magic. She was touching my arm as we talked, and staring deeply into my eyes, all the things that signal a man that she wants him. As hard as I was trying to resist it, the tent in my trousers was growing.
When we put on a movie, she asked me to sit next to her. A few minutes later I felt an electric shock as she scooted closer and leaned her back against me. I unconsciously wrapped my arm around her and pulled her closer. She winced in pain. She pushed my arm away quickly, then repositioned herself. I thought I had just blown the first female contact I had felt in a year. I felt my heart sink and accepted that I had made a mistake. When then she pulled my arm back over her and placed my hand on her abdomen, I was relived, and quite aroused. She truly did have magnificent abs. I had never noticed but beneath a cute little sweater, she had firm, toned, abs. My mind raced with all the things I wanted to do to her, but my conscience was getting in the way.
She started rambling as the movie played. Obviously the drugs were really kicking in now. She was limp up against me, and was talking about how nobody wanted her. I held her close and comforted her. I told her that lots of people wanted her, but she shouldn’t settle for anyone who didn’t understand her. She told me how she had cheated, and that she only did it because she couldn’t sleep alone. She said she suffers form terrible nightmares about her childhood, and they only leave her alone when she has someone holding her. My heart broke for her. In that moment it all made sense. She had no respect for herself, because sex didn’t mean anything to her. It was nothing more than a commodity to be traded for, in her case, sleep. Who wouldn’t sacrifice something that meant so little to them for something they so desperately needed? I squeezed her in close and whispered that I would stay over tonight. I told her that a real man wouldn’t ask her to disrespect herself just to find rest. And with that she slipped off to sleep.
The movie ended and she rested peacefully. I however, was in agony. Here was a beautiful woman, who had all but said I could have my way with her, then had fallen asleep on my lap practically. As she nuzzled into me in her sleep, I felt a very familiar stirring in my loins. Her sweater had ridden up to just below the swell of her ample breasts and her shifting position had drawn down her sweat pants to her panty line. I was practically salivating. My hand rested on those firm bare abs. Her skin was so soft and warm. I wanted to feel more, I NEEDED to feel more. Then again, what kind of a bastard feels up a sleeping woman? It insulted me to even think such a thought, yet I slid my fingernails across her delicious skin. She was resting comfortably with a slight grin on her full lips. My heart was pounding in my head as she shifted position, offering me even better access to her full chest. I couldn’t resist anymore, I slit my hand up and cupped her firm, full breast. I hefted it in my hand and brushed my thumb over where escort pendik her nipple must be hiding. In an instant, her nipple had hardened. A similar reaction was going on in my pants. I felt my cock straining against the material of my trousers. And pressing against her flawless neck. There was a definite smile on her face as her other nipple joined the first in it’s salute. Her skin was on fire. I could feel the heat coming from her core when I returned my hand to it’s accepted resting place upon her abdomen.
What kind of a man was I, giving into temptation like that? I could actually end up in prison for that. My brain hurt, and my heart was pounding. I was guilty of one of the most heinous crimes a man can commit. Yet she had sort of offered, hadn’t she? Was the fact that she had said she didn’t care supposed to absolve me of my guilt? I tried to contemplate it, tried to rationalize it, but I was at an ethical crossroads I didn’t dare question. Yet her warm young body was still there, stretched before me like a feast for the eyes. So once again I found my hands wandering.
This time I ventured lower. To the valley between her thighs. I moved slowly and ran my hand over the outside of her sweat pants. There was a tremendous heat emanating from her loins and the hint of her scent remained on my fingers. I inhaled her musk and felt a trigger flip in my brain. She was actually enjoying this, whether in dream or in consciousness, her body was responding to my caress. I retreated my hand back to her abdomen yet again, regrouping for my next move. My mind was racing now, and the fact that she was enjoying this on some level changed everything. My conscience lost out in straight sets, and I continued to explore Beth’s beautiful body. I lifted her shirt gently over her voluptuous mounds and took in the sight of them. They were so firm and heavy, as they would have to be. She didn’t have much extra weight on her trim figure. Her bra was a plain padded cup number as seems to be common in the larger, less common sizes. I watches as goosebumps rose on her skin as the cool night air touched it, and again my cock hardened painfully as her nipples saluted once again.
I couldn’t quite get her well made bra cups down to reveal her tender flesh, so in frustration I turned my attentions elsewhere. I grazed my fingertips along her torso and felt her shudder as my fingers moved below her bellybutton. I caressed the tender skin at her exposed panty line. My cock was aching and my head was swimming in her intoxicating aroma. I slid a finger under the fabric of her pink panties, then a second one, the two more. I found myself caressing her fuzzy mound skin to delicious skin. She snorted and moved a bit, but that only spread her legs farther apart. I held my hand still until she was finished moving. Her adjustment had moved my hand deeper into her panties. And I could feel the shelf of her pelvis as it fell off between her thighs.
I hadn’t meant for it to go this far, I hadn’t meant for ANY of this to happen, I was about to pull my hand back, but I wanted to feel that last mysterious inch of flesh. With my cock throbbing and my heart pounding I moved my hand in deeper. I was farther down her torso than I had realized and my slight movement over the shelf placed two fingers directly over her clit. She jerked slightly and I was sure she had held her breath just for a moment. I moved my fingers down again and found them in the middle of a soaking wet slit. Her clit throbbed to my touch and her juices coated my fingers as I moved them in circles around her extruded love button. I moved deeper yet again, seating my middle finger deep insider her tender sex. Her juices continued to flow around my finger. Beth shifted again. The sudden movement after so much freedom to explore shocked me back into reality. I removed my hand from her panties and tried to refocus myself. Seconds later she rolled over and looked up at me. She asked why I was still there. I told her that the movie had just ended and that I didn’t want to wake her because I knew how precious a commodity her sleep was. She said I was sweet and asked If I would carry her to bed.
I climbed the stairs to her bedroom with her slender, half conscious form in my arms. I laid her on the bed and situated the blankets over her. She pulled her shirt over her head as soon as the covers were in place, and her sweat pants came flying out next. She called me to the other side of the bed and asked me to lay down. My heart was racing, and my mind was yelling at me again. She had asked me here to be a good friend and keep her company, not sleep with her.
When she rolled away from me, I was relieved, but then she pulled her covers off her shoulder and asked me to unclasp her bra for her. I was losing my mind. I slid my hand up her side and to the middle of her incredibly sexy back to unclasped a nemesis disguised as lingerie. She breathed a sigh of relief as the bra was pulled off her shoulders and discarded. Her back was exposed from the nape of her neck to the triangle of her ass where I noticed adorable pendik escort bayan dimples and also that her panties were gone. My cock was in overdrive, but my conscience was making up lost ground. If I was going to make love to this angelic creature, it couldn’t be tainted by drugs and alcohol. She would have to be of sound mind and, most of all, fully conscious. I pulled the covers up over her incredible torso, kissed her on the cheek and bid her goodnight. She tried to protest, but she was still falling asleep. I told her that she didn’t owe me anything, and that she would sleep just fine with her dogs there. She was too tired to disagree and her last words before I left were the sweetest I had heard in some time. She simply said:
“Call me.”
The next three weeks were maddening. Beth and I both work two jobs and could not find time to get together again for nearly a month. I was losing my mind remembering the contours of her body, the warmth of her flesh, and the responsiveness of her skin. When she called me and told me she wanted to watch movies together again, I was elated. But a deep guilt crept in to steal my happiness. My heart hurt with regret for the trust I had broken, even though she knew nothing about it. I swore to myself that I would tell her, though I worried for my freedom. I would not deny the crime I had committed if confronted. My fate ultimately rested in her dainty hands.
The day finally arrived and I met Beth at her house again for a few drinks and a movie. We made jokes, and flirted a bit as we picked out a movie. I was just sitting down, when she slapped the couch cushion next to her and waved me over. She laughed at me and told me to come keep her warm and to stop acting silly. I complied and sat down in my favorite spot, right next to the most beautiful woman I had ever touched. As the movie played we chatted and flirted a bit. At one point she leaned in and pulled my arm around her shoulder again. My heart began pounding again. I knew where this was going. She hadn’t had nearly as much to drink tonight and no painkillers this time. She KNEW what she was doing, and also knew she didn’t need to trade sex to get me to stay…but I still had to tell her about last time.
As we watched, Beth pulled my hand down onto her abdomen again. Then she grabbed my other hand and laced her fingers with mine. I felt electricity flow through our grip and felt a swelling in my groin. She laid he head back and gazed lazily at the TV screen.
“This Is nice.” She said as she laced the fingers of her other hand with mine as well.
“I could certainly get used to it.” I replied. My mind was churning again, it was now or never.
“B, there is something I need to tell you before you get too comfortable.” She looked at me quizzically.
“What is it?” She asked. With a lump in my throat I told her.
“Last time I was here, When you were sleeping…well, I touched your body a bit.” I am a horrible person and I never intended it to happen, but you are so beautiful and a guy like me doesn’t stand a chance.”
She was silent for a moment, her entire body had stiffened, I knew I was in trouble, but I didn’t know how much. After a moment she asked me a question.
“What exactly did you do?” her tone was serious but there was understanding in her voice. I hung my head in disgrace and told her.
“I massaged you breasts and rubbed inside you panties for a bit. I’m so sorry.” she thought for a moment, then asked another question.
“What exactly were you doing inside my panties?” My voice caught in my throat when she slid my hand below her waist line.
“Show me what you you were doing.” She demanded in the most serious voice I’ve ever heard her use.
I nodded then began rubbing her loins through her pants. The fabric was a smooth synthetic blend and elastic in nature. I could feel her flesh moving beneath the fabric. My cock shot back to life when a moan escaped her lips. I began to rub faster in a circular motion over her clitoris. I looked down and noticed that her nipples were again standing at full salute. I brought my left hand up and tried to cup her left breast, but her hand was still intertwined with mine. She shook her hand loose from mine and forced my hand onto her breast with hers on top of my own. Her breathing was coming in ragged breaths now, and her other hand was on top of mine helping me in my movement on her clit. Without warning she pulled my hand away from her loins and pulled the elastic fabric of her pants away from her body. She begged me to touch her again and got no hesitation from me. I slid my hand over her perfectly shaved mons and slid two fingers over her soaked sex. She shook at the sudden and unhindered contact. Two of my fingers found their way into her depths. My cock ached and throbbed as I heard the squishing sound of her wetness as my fingers entered her. There was a yip followed by a moan. And then I saw Beth’s fantastic body shake in orgasm. It was sudden and seemed to have taken her by surprise. I pushed my fingers deeper and saw a renewed spasm of ecstasy pulse through her. It kept rolling, building somehow, until her body was convulsing on my fingers and I was squeezing her ample breast as much to keep her from flipping onto the floor as for my own enjoyment.