Penelope Josephson sat shivering on the bus which was to take her the three hundred miles from her home town to the city where she was to start work as a cadet accounts clerk- Officer she corrected herself- Accounts Officer and hopefully start on her journey in adult life.
It was the biggest thing she had ever done in her life and she was terrified. It wasn’t just the ‘going to be on her own’ part of it (although that was something she tried hard not to think about) but rather the prospect of not having her mom in her life to guide her.
Her mother was her rock. She always had guided her and as in many way Penelope’s mom was an older version of Penelope with the same timidity and shyness coupled with that dogged determination her advice was always easy for Penelope to take tempered as it was by her mother’s keen understanding of what Penelope could deal with and what she couldn’t- especially what she couldn’t.
It had been her idea and when she told Penelope the poor girl had fled to her bedroom to lie on her bed curled up in a ball with her head under her pillows. Gradually she had brought Penelope round to the point that she finally agreed it was a good idea for her to go- even if she really actually um didn’t want to go at all.
However there she was on the Greyhound, her mother and sister watching until the bus moved off …then they were gone. As soon as they were out of sight she missed them. She missed them so much and felt miserable. Her mouth drooped and a tear formed in the corner of one eye. Soon after a matching one tear formed in the corner of the other eye. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and turned her face to the window with a tissue so she wouldn’t sniff sand let anyone know how upset she was.
The thing was that she knew she had to do it. Her mom couldn’t support them all and there wasn’t any work in her town. Not real work. So she had to go to this big city where she had no friends and somehow make a life then maybe she could put some money aside to send back to help her mom out. That was a nice thought and it cheered her up. In any case something good might happen. Her mom had told her something good was ‘bound to happen’ and that ‘it always did.’
“Bound to ‘was more than Pamela dared hoped for; she settled for ‘might.’
Now she felt, well the word is virtuous; she also started to feel drowsy. The bus swept along with the gentle repetitive movements and before long she had fallen fast asleep.
The bus stopped at other towns along the way and at the second of these Wilma Fitzroy was waiting. A woman of thirty Wilma had been visiting her family and was now going back to her real home, to her life, in the City.
No she wasn’t. She was going back to her apartment in which no one waited. After the break up with Raylene she had felt so down and on a whim had gone back expecting a cuddle and some words of encouragement from her mother and one or two from her dad.. Then it would be OK. She could get back on the horse so to speak and carry on but it hadn’t worked out that way. She revealed that she was a lesbian and as she talked their expressions changed.
They had looked at her with narrow eyes as she told them. Her father had got up from his chair, turned his back on her and slammed the door on his way out. Her mother lectured her on ‘a woman’s responsibilities’ and the ‘selfishness of what she was doing’ adding a mention of the perverted life she had chosen.
Then she too had walked out leaving a shell shocked Wilma alone at the table.
She has screamed at them through the walls hating them for what they had done to her but still wanting them to rush back in and hug her, to tell her it was fine she was still their daughter and they loved her no matter what.
But they didn’t.
She spent the longest night of her life in her old bed and had rung for a cab hours before the bus would be there just to get out of the place.
For all that strangely the visit hadn’t been a complete waste of time. Their utter rejection of her choices and also of her had forced her to decide how committed she was to going ahead. Quite capable of absolute bloody mindedness herself she was now implacably convinced that she was right; that being a lesbian might not be for every girl but it bloody well was for her.
She tried to read to fill in the time while she waited by reading but she couldn’t. More than anything what she understood from her night of hell was that she was alone. Not that she didn’t have friends but they weren’t significant others. Her heart didn’t skip a beat when she thought of them; they were friends. Friends who had a significant other and she was outside of those relationship.
What made it worse was that her rocks, her parents, were not in her corner so if it got bad, as it had been, she couldn’t go to them. It was terrifying, even at her age to know that.
She had put the book down, finally, and closed her eyes thinking of what she wanted- or rather who she wanted.
Someone younger would bursa eskort bayan be best because she was a Bossy Britches. That brought a smile. Yes she was the organizer so in this ideal relationship her partner would be younger and placid.
That didn’t sound right. “Partner” it was such a prim word; it reminded her of the equally prim PC ‘siblings’. “The girl I adore” that sounded better. “My better half” or “my lover” came to mind as well.
In the end she decided on “she”. She revised the ‘placid’ as well. In fact she discarded it deciding instead that she wanted someone to love and regardless of if she was a fiery little thing or a gangly tall girl or a whatever what mattered was the chemistry.
“Bossy Britches,” she muttered under her breath and she felt another smile.
The bus was due in a few minutes and suddenly she had to go. She got the last cubicle and was walking back into the waiting room as the bus pulled up-perfect timing.
It meant a lot to her this coincidence of the bus arriving as she was back from the bathroom; she saw it as a sign that things were going to run her way and felt a surge of hope in her chest.
With her luggage stowed she climbed on board to find somewhere to sit. There were about half a dozen empty seats as far as she could see. She was looking to see whom she wanted to sit by and she saw her. A sleeping girl who had rested her elbow on the sill and leant against her arm pressed up against the window. Wilma sat next to her. The girl was so soundly asleep that she didn’t even seem to notice her sitting down. Wilma was very aware of her though; she had butterflies in her tummy and her throat was dry.
When she had sat down she had looked around exchanging smiles with her fellow travelers before bringing out her book and propping it open on her lap to begin her reading. A little while after the bus had got underway again Wilma turned towards the window pretending to be fascinated by the view. The fear was there again. God she hated that. Why couldn’t she just look at this girl and not have to worry about what people might think?
She wished she was a lot braver than she felt at that moment and it was with a churning tummy that she sneaked a good look at her, the girl with whom she was besotted. She was pretty in a girl next door way. Slim with mousy brown hair in a pony tail, just a coat of school girl cheap pink lipstick and a little eye shadow. Every fiber of Wilma’s body tingled as she studied the face. Wilma knew it- she was the one.
She wanted so much for her to like her and as the girl slept beside her Wilma went all out to make herself beautiful. No, she was beautiful already- she knew that- she wanted to be spectacular. She wanted this Anne or Helen or Ashley or what ever her name was to see her and fall for her.
That was so pathetic, she decided. She hoped the girl would like her and that that it would go from there. Only she didn’t; she wanted so much more; she wanted sparks, passion, with candlelight dinners and dancing, just the two of them in their own little world. Quick phone calls snatched through the day and that tingling as she waits for the next call and to feel the tears in her eyes as this girl who is her life says those words: ‘I love you.’
She worked methodically keeping her pounding heart under control and limiting herself to one furtive glance only after she had finished a part of her make up. Each time she glanced she hoped as hard as she could that she would stay asleep until she had finished.
Her luck held again with a stirring next to her as she had just finished getting her hair just so when Penelope did wake up. .
She had dozed thinking of her life to be. Wondering about her new room at the boarding house, what everyone would be like at work and how quickly she would pick things up…if she would make any friends.
Sleep, the deep sleep she was in when Wilma had sat next to her came with her favorite dream. It stemmed from an incident on a school camp when she had grazed her leg and Miss Manuel had wiped her leg clean then put a big plaster over the graze. There had been nothing sexual in it and Miss Manuel wouldn’t have thought any more about it but it became, for Penelope, the door to a world of sexual fantasy, lesbian fantasy which she enjoyed very much. In her dream she was always hurt in some way and a beautiful older lady would tend for her. Naturally the ministrations would grow to a passionate embrace ending in the lady making love to her usually with a strap on.
Penelope woke but kept her eyes shut just a little longer; she smelt perfume. Turning she saw Wilma and was stunned, not only at her beauty but at how much she was like the ladies in her dreams, in fact she could quit easily have stepped out from one. However as in real life Penelope was painfully shy her look was timid and inquiring.
It simply melted Wilma’s heart. She looked at Penelope quite unable to hide her feelings for her and delighted the anxious uncertain Penelope with bursa otele gelen eskort bayan the smile that broke out on her beautiful face.
Penelope smiled back. She was utterly beautiful Wilma realized; a pure spirit.
“Hi, I’m Wilma, like in the Flintstones,” she said softly introducing herself and making light of her name which she truly hated. It just made her sound middle aged. The girl (thankfully) hadn’t appeared to have noticed anything wrong with her name at all and her face had lit up when Wilma had mentioned The Flintstones.
“Oh Hi,” Penelope had started “, I’m Penelope like um, well I’m not sure. It isn’t a very popular name mine…sorry.”
If the earth could have opened up for her she would have been very grateful. How could she be so stupid? In front of this lady- from her dreams! She would find somewhere else to sit. After this disaster what else would she do? Oh and she’d talk about her to the woman she sat next to and point at Penelope winding her index finger round her ear with them nodding patiently at what a stupid girl Penelope was.
She wished she were back at home in her bedroom.
“Penelope? That is such a pretty name and, so feminine.”
She heard the lady say the words and her heart jumped.
“Really?” she asked anxiously “, Do you think so?”
“Of course and besides a name is a name; just a word it’s what you are that counts.”
“Is it?”
“Yes, always.”
She smiled and shrugged. .
“Slow down,’ she told herself “, you’re acting like a school teacher. Oh God she’s just so perfect.”
“Oh, hey, I think it is, don’t you?”
She had smiled and closed her lips once the words were out.
“I think so, mind you having a pretty name would help,” Penelope replied after a short period of reflection.
“And you don’t? Try going through life as Wilma.”
She said it “willmah” and rolled her eyes.
“I guess.”
She smiled properly now; a radiant smile of pure delight that lit up her face and nearly brought Wilma to tears.
God she was still perfect.
They had clicked and both not only wanted the other but knew she wanted her as well. It was the most amazingly warm feeling Penelope thought and she glanced at Wilma with a face of pure delight. Wilma had to tense to restrict her expression to just a mild smile. She was euphoric. This was the one. She didn’t just sense it, or hope it or even project it; she knew it. With every single fiber of her being she knew it.
Aware of not drawing attention to themselves they got on with their individual activities. . Wilma took her book from her bag and sat with it open on her lap. Penelope, who had been well supplied by her thoughtful mother, brought a copy of Teen Scene from her bag and also a Tupperware container filled with (Economy Brand) mixed nuts.
She opened the container and held it out for Wilma to take some.
She did, saying thank you and popping the nuts in one by one as she concentrated on her book. Soon after she had finished eating she closed her book then bent down to get a packet of chocolate coated marshmallows from her bag. It was cellophane and she had to rip it open. Penelope was watching and somehow Wilma trying to open this stubborn packet apparently made of extra strength cellophane from the Planet Krypton had her in tears as she tried so hard not to chortle.
Wilma, still stressed, and now red in the face, held the packet out for her.
\
Now it was her turn to feel like an idiot. Gutted she waited.
Penelope reached over, ignoring the bag; her hand went to Wilma’s forearm which she held gently, stroking it with her thumb.
“It’s just a silly packet,” she told the humbled older woman “, and I don’t even think I could work out how to open it…it looks very strong.”
She mouthed something after and it looked for all the world like
“Love you,” to Wilma.
Wilma mouthed “, love you” back to see Penny’s face light up. Yes, she had it right.
Heartened Wilma brought out her cashmere travel rug. It was a good size as travel rugs go and it covered them both from half way up their fronts to the floor. It felt wonderful to Penelope; so soft and light but also warm and cozy- like being under the covers with Wilma.
She loved the sound of Wilma’s name saying it silently over and over and feeling her mouth make the movements. Wilma adored her. It was the first time anyone had adored her and it was something, she decided happily, that she could easily get used to. Wilma had spread the rug over her taking such care to get it just right for her.-her forearm had brushed Penelope’s breast as well- that had been nice.
Penelope had held on to the packet and the Tupperware container while Wilma had done the rug.
Neither had said a word and both knew what to do. After the rug Wilma had brought some more candy as well as two sipper bottles of fruit juice for them from her travel bag. Naturally one was for bursa eve gelen escort Penny (it was actually for later in the trip but right then ‘for Penny” was just fine) and she drank from the other one.
Again they went back to reading with the food on the rug in the hollow between them. More time passed then Penny held a cashew up in front of Wilma’s mouth. She rolled her eyes at Penny but instead of just giving it to her Penny had wagged her finger and re presented the cashew.
Wilma gave in turning her face up and opening wide so her darling could drop it in. It was massive in the relationship of course and afterwards Penny had hunkered down and looked for all the world like a little girl who had done something terribly daring and is waiting to hear what her mom or her teacher has to say.
In reply Wilma took her hand and kissed it. She got a succession of nibbles presented to her and did the same back to Penny. When they had finished they again sat as two individuals but Penelope was glowing.
Lovers games; that’s what they had been playing she decided- lovers’ games.
She really and truly was the lady from her dreams she decided- only even nicer. Under the rug she put her hand across the few inches and, taking all her courage in her hands, touched Wilma’s leg. Her hand rested there as Wilma smiled at her then leaned across to whisper.
“That’s nice.”
The hand gently caressed Wilma’s thigh with the finger tips running down to the side of her knee, over the knee cap then back up along the top of the thigh. Wilma sighed and breathed out. Her hand slipped under the rug and covered Penelope’s pressing it to her skin.
If there was any doubt before about what both wanted in the relationship it was gone now. Wilma drew their hands up from under the rug bringing Penelope’s to her lips and kissed it.
She slid them back under and now sat turned in feeling Penny’s bare leg pressed against hers. Both has eased their skirts up and pulled them up from under their bottoms. She trailed her fingertips up Penny’s thigh to her panties. The fingers slid over the panties to the waist band and slipped under.
Penny held her breath as the fingers slid down her skin to her hair. She wished she could have shaved but her mom hadn’t believed in it and with no reason for anyone to make inquiries about what she had down there Penelope had never done anything about it.
She wished she had.
All she could do was splay her legs as the finger tips combed through her hair to the top of her slit. She looked at Wilma, smiled timidly then closed her eyes and waited. Wilma slid her fingers down with the big finger slipping into the wet channel.
She rubbed in the slip a few times then let the finger rest in the wetness before hooking it and probing into Penny’s vagina. She pushed in then wiggled her finger widening her lover’s opening. All the while she had watched Penny’s face. Her eyes has widened when the finger had probed then closed as she had sunk down in the seat.
Her lover’s hand was in her pants! No, it was in her pussy. It felt wonderful in there but it couldn’t be there long. Not on a bus for gosh sakes.
It wasn’t. Wilma gave it a few more seconds then slowly drew her finger from Penny’s vagina and brought her hand too her lips. She sucked each finger then cleaned her hand with a wipe which she put in a plastic rubbish bag in her travel bag.
Penelope got two wipes from her bag and slipped a hand under the rug to wipe her pussy then put them in the rubbish bag in her travel bag. Her mom had sent her well prepared.
Time stood still. The next stop was forty five minutes away and it seemed like forty five days. Somehow, though, they lasted and though they longed to hold hands they didn’t; they got off at different times meeting as if by accident at the café. The queued for their meals then took their trays to sit opposite each other at a table off to one side.
They ate fast saying little for fear of being overheard.
“Lets have a look at the shops,” Wilma suggested, just a little loudly, once they had finished.
“Well just a few minutes I guess,” Penny had replied much more quietly, knowing that all eyes were upon them.
They moved as two women with no rapport between them might towards the door. Wilma stopping to speak briefly to the driver while Penny got to the door on her own and feigned annoyance that this woman was wasting time.
It was quality acting and it fooled no one- although they weren’t to know that.
They moved twenty yards away.
“Oh I wish we could be alone and, well, just talk,” Penny told her.
“Me too…there’s so much I want to tell you…so much I want to hear about you…”
“Well I love you. How’s that for starters?”
“Oh, I know that,” Wilma tossed her head back and moved along as if there was something of far more interest in the window display.
Penny moved with her and when Wilma stopped she kept moving stopping only inches from the other woman’s face.
“God I want to kiss you so much,” she murmured and from inches away Penny breathed,
“Oh yeah.”
Without realizing it Penny had tilted her face ready for the kiss.
“They’re in love! Look at that and tell me I’m wrong,” Martha Simmons the smiling granny who had occupied the seat behind them declared triumphantly.